Dealing with Grief and Senior Loss: Vivian Nunez

Grief is a natural response to loss. Our volunteers provide service to people in the later years of their lives; therefore it is possible for our community to experience the loss of a senior. Although there is no universal guide to dealing with grief, we believe advice from individuals who have been through the grieving process is beneficial for others who have never experienced those feelings or are unsure on how to approach them.

Vivian Nunez is a writer and content creator. Her award-winning Instagram community has created pathways for speaking on traditionally taboo topics, like mental health and grief. Vivian details how grief affects young adults and provides some insightful advice for them.

How does grief affect young adults?

The ins and outs of how grief affects anyone is very individualized, even within the same families. It's true that loved ones may lose the same person, but everyone's relationship to that person is so unique and personal. While I can only speak to my experience of losing my grandmother when I was 21 years old, I know that personal grief can be very isolating. Since it's not a commonly spoken about topic, it can feel lonely in addition to being very overwhelming. It's important then to allow your grief to unfold in whatever way it does in your own life and try not to play the comparison game with other people's grief. Instead, try to find a community of people who understand how grief is personally manifesting in your life and who are there to support you. 

What are 3 healthy ways to deal with grief?

Three things that have helped me navigate my grief are journaling, meditating, and going to therapy/finding a community of fellow grievers who understood it.

 I think that depending on where you are with your grief, some things will work more than others or the kinds of things that maybe used to work for you, won't anymore and will leave you wondering why? It's important to leave space for new healthy coping mechanisms and define for yourself what makes something "healthy" in your life. Once you do, you'll be able to continue to find new healthy coping techniques no matter the season. 

What are effective ways to approach volunteering after experiencing loss?

Once you're ready, it can feel good to pour your energy or time into helping support others. Finding a volunteering opportunity in an area that helps you feel a connection to your loved one can become a special way of honoring them and how you saw them. It's true too that finding an opportunity that brings you joy because you love it can also help in ensuring you feel fulfilled.  Even if you're only volunteering at first as a distaction, know that there's nothing wrong with that. We all need a distraction from grief at some points, so that we're able to come back to it with more perspective. 

How can one help their fellow volunteers cope?

For the adults in the lives of those who are grieving it's important to validate the young adults experience and to not shy away from conversations about the person they lost. While it's important to leave room for someone to say "I don't want to talk about this," it's also a wonderful sign of support to even ask, "hey do you want to talk about X person or how you're dealing with it?" Because they may not get asked it often. 

Dealing with grief and senior loss is not an easy topic. We are thankful to Vivian for this opportunity to collaborate and provide our volunteers with support for difficult situations.